Will There Ever Be Another Great Hip-Hop Beef?

When was the last time we had a great hip hop beef? The kind of beef that you had to record on your cassette and play it over and over with your friends because it was that dope? The kind of beef that solidified who your favorite rapper was going to be for the next few years and who you would lose all respect for at least until the storm blew over?

It’s been a minute.

The last beef that I can think of that kept me wholly entertained was 50 Cent vs Everybody. But, I’m tired of that now and 50 just doesn’t keep me as entertained as he used to. Partly because I’m not 16 anymore and I’ve realized that dumb celebrity ish doesn’t pay my bills.

With all that being said, I think it’s time for a new great hip hop beef. But, instead of a muscular dude who got shot nine times and a singing/rapping/crooning thug, we should get to pick who participates in the beef. After all, aren’t we the ones putting coins their pockets? Right.

The East Coast slash West Coast thing is played out. Plus, I’ve lived on both coasts and I love Jhene Aiko and Alicia Keys. Don’t make me choose between the two.

I can’t join any color coordinating gangs. One: I don’t think my employer would take to that. Two: I like to wear certain colors depending on my mood. I can’t imagine having to wear red every day or replace every first letter with the letter “b”. Too much effort.

We should choose two artists who would represent this essential struggle.

Kanye & Beck.

It’s genius when you think about it. This beef transcend race. It’s a beef against real artistry and people who can’t recognize real artistry. It’s a beef against Beyonce and people who are sick of her robotic charades. It’s a beef against Tidal. (Feel free to add anything that you think Kanye or Beck represents).

I, for one, just want someone to shut Kanye up. He used to be my favorite rapper hands down, but ever since he became a Kardashian (legally) I’ve been meaning to start a petition to have his black card revoked.

Can someone get Dave Chappelle on the line and ask him if we can trade Yeezus for Rachel Dolezal?

I guess Ye may be humbling himself a bit, because he went on record the other day to say that after listening to Becks album he realized that “I was inaccurate with the concept of a gentleman who plays 14 instruments not respecting artistry”.

Now all we need is for Beck to drop a hot 16 (or whatever Alternative Emo artists drop) so that we can get this beef started like it pose to be.


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